THE MYTH OF THE PIT BULL LAWYER

In this video I discuss the “myth” of pit bull lawyers and how, often times, all they do is inflame the situation making it more costly for you and your family. In my experience, 99% of the time, a thoughtful, reasonable attorney and counselor accomplishes more with less cost (financial and emotional capital) than lawyers who pound the table and scream and holler.

If you would like to confidentially discuss your family law matter, please contact me here.

What Is An Uncontested Divorce

A seemingly oxymoronic term, the uncontested divorce has hit the mainstream of late. While I think this is an excellent development since I am a collaboratively trained family attorney and believe knock down litigation rarely benefits most couples and families, I believe this style of divorce deserves a bit of explanation and clarification.

An uncontested divorce is a divorce where both parties agree on the major issues. These issues include;

  • The division of property;
  • Sharing of parenting time and responsibilities (if the parties have minor children);
  • The amount and duration of any child support;
  • The amount and duration of alimony (spousal support); and
  • Distribution of debt(s)

Uncontested divorces are “easiest” when either (1) the parties have been married a relatively short period of time or (2) the parties do not have minor children. That said, if parties do have children, but agree in large party on all necessary requirements for the dissolution of the marriage, all that is needed is to file a Complaint for Divorce, memorialize the agreement and parties’ wishes in a Judgment of Divorce and have it entered by the Court. I have had uncontested divorces where only one party had an attorney. I always make it absolutely clear that I exclusively represent the rights of one party and have no legal duty or obligation to the other party. To ensure they truly understand (and to protect myself), I typically make them sign a letter and waiver to this effect. Parties can still engage in an uncontested divorce with each having their own lawyer (just to ensure each side is protected and the Judgment of Divorce and its terms are fair, reasonable and accurate).

All of this sounds great, right? The trouble comes when Party A believes it is/will be uncontested, hires their lawyer on that belief, and then Party B either immediately or as the case goes on dictates (either directly or indirectly) that the divorce is not uncontested. When this arises, expectations of both the attorney and party need to be discussed and addressed as this completely changes the landscape, timeline, complexity and costs of the case.

Limited scope representation lends itself quite well to uncontested divorces. With this, we can work to ensure you have the most flexible and cost-effective assistance (i.e. paying for a detailed consultation, preparing pleadings, reviewing documents or appearing for a pro confesso hearing). Limited scope representation lets you pick and choose what services you want and is more affordable depending on how much or little assistance and representation you want/need.

If you are interested in an uncontested divorce, please contact me and I will help you determine your options and best strategy.

How To Avoid Parenting Time Disputes Over The Summer

Ah, yes, one of our favorite times of the year…summer. It epitomizes America, from the 4th of July to Labor Day weekend, and is usually filled with barbeques, swimming, and fireworks. But, for those who co-parent as well as family lawyers and courts from sea to shining sea, summer weekends often turn into parenting time confrontations and disputes between many.

Holidays and special weekends can be tricky and difficult for divorcing and separated parents, as there may be no established rules (or ambiguous ones) for parenting time. During holidays, it is common for co-parents without specific and precise parenting time plans and schedules to get into hot water. For parents in these situations, here are a few tips to help:

Plan and Have Open Communication – The old adage “if you plan for the worst, you can expect the best” holds true. If you discuss and lay out plans in advance, chances are better that you will be able have success in meeting them.

Be Flexible – It also pays for couples to be flexible in giving parents time with children. Long summer days allow for both parents to have a great deal of time with kids, whether it is on Sunday (the Fourth of July) or sometime during the weekend. Also, at the end of the day, family courts expect parents to put their children’s interests first and holiday scheduling is no exception.

Control your emotions – Avoid the temptation to seek retribution when you feel you were wronged or short-changed with parenting time in the past. Playing tit for tat with parenting time is treacherous as it shows that a parent is willing to use their children as pawns in a never-ending twisted game of parental chess. You should never feel you are being taken advantage of or missing time with your child – but be mindful of balancing these feelings with your overall time with your children as well as their best interests and quality of life.

Should you have questions about divorce, custody or parenting time (with respect to a special summer weekend or any other holidays and schedules), please reach out to us or another family law attorney to ensure you are doing what is best for both you and your children this summer season.